Atomic Habits: Tiny Changes, Remarkable Results

We don’t choose our earliest habits, we imitate them. We follow the script handed down by our friends and family, our church or school, our local community and society at large. Each of these cultures and groups comes with its own set of expectations and standards—when and whether to get married, how many children to have, which holidays to celebrate, how much money to spend on your child’s birthday party. In many ways, these social norms are the invisible rules that guide your behavior each day.

We soak up the qualities and practices of those around us.

As the psychologist Carl Jung said, “
Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate.”

Suffering drives progress. The source of all suffering is the desire for a change in state. This is also the source of all progress. The desire to change your state is what powers you to take action. It is wanting more that pushes humanity to seek improvements, develop new technologies, and reach for a higher level. With craving, we are dissatisfied but driven. Without craving, we are satisfied but lack ambition.

Peace occurs when you don’t turn your observations into problems.

Then, I reflect on my progress (or lack thereof) by answering three questions:

What went well this year?

What didn’t go so well this year?

What did I learn?

When it’s time to write, there will be days that you don’t feel like typing. But stepping up when it’s annoying or painful or draining to do so, that’s what makes the difference between a professional and an amateur.

Boiling water will soften a potato but harden an egg. You can’t control whether you’re a potato or an egg, but you can decide to play a game where it’s better to be hard or soft.

A good player works hard to win the game everyone else is playing. A great
player creates a new game that favors their strengths and avoids their weaknesses.

Dyrsmid began each morning with two jars on his desk. One was filled with 120 paper clips. The other was empty. As soon as he settled in each day, he would make a sales call. Immediately after, he would move one paper clip from the full jar to the empty jar and the process would begin again.