Overcoming Compulsive Eating

When eating becomes secretive, it becomes more exciting and more difficult to give up.

which you need if your inner world is chaotic.

It removes you from reality and leaves you in a stupor, so you can blot out anxiety.

It gives you a temporary high, a kind of euphoria, until guilt sets in about what you did. Food does this when you feel full; gambling and spending money give a sense of danger and power.

When you can love your real self, you will not stop loving yourself just because you are not perfect all the time in every way.

You can become less of a perfectionist by doing the following:

• Try to see the inbetweens, instead of seeing everything in extremes.

• Live in the present, instead of the future or the past.

• Set lower standards for yourself and for others.

• Allow yourself and others to make mistakes.

• Give yourself credit for what you do.

• Get rid of “always” and “never,” replace them with “sometimes” and “usually” in your thoughts and conversations.

An empty stomach is only one cause of hunger. Another may be food itself. For example, if you have an allergic reaction to certain food, eating that food may make you feel hungry. If you have low blood sugar, eating something high in carbohydrates will make you hungry. A breakfast of muffins, toast, bagels, or most sweet cereals will trigger hunger faster than eggs, meat, or cheese. Combining some fat with a protein food will slow down digestion and keep you less hungry.

For women, feeling hungry just before your menstrual period is normal. It is important for compulsive eaters to know this and to check the calendar. Try to eat more protein rather than carbohydrates at such times. If you get the blues and crave sugar to make you feel better, try instead to eat foods that will raise your estrogen level: eggs, milk products, and legumes.

) The binger eats normal amounts at meals, but eats great amounts at other times in one sitting, often late at night. Eating a lot at one sitting can be a reward for having been deprived all day of your favorite foods, especially if you eat very drab foods at meals. Your binge may be the result of not wanting to be seen indulging by others, so you may become a sneak eater who only binges when alone (see below).

(b) The plate cleaner eats until there is no more food on the plate or the table, regardless of appetite or capacity. Usually, plate cleaners were taught to always clean their plate as children, and this has become a habit that needs to be unlearned.

(c) The nibbler eats normal amounts at meals, but has countless mini-meals all day while doing other things such as cooking or talking on the phone. Nibblers fool themselves into thinking that they do not really eat much.

(d) The snacker eats normal amounts at meals, but eats many snacks — mostly junk food — between meals. Snackers may restrict what they eat at meals and then feel deprived, and so reward themselves by eating forbidden foods between meals. Snackers tend to convince themselves that the snacks do not count as calorie intake.

(e) The stuffer eats only at mealtimes, but always until really full and uncomfortable. If you are a stuffer, you have panicky feelings about being hungry, and so you overeat and never experience hunger. Or you may anticipate starting a diet tomorrow, so want to eat now while you can, like a camel storing water before a trek in the desert.

(f) The stuffer-starver feels guilty about overeating, so starves all day, feels very hungry at night, and eats until bedtime. The next day the cycle is repeated. When you behave this way, you feel deprived and overeat out of resentment.

(g) The sneak eater eats normal amounts or not at all in front of others; when alone, the sneak eater binges. Sneak eaters assume that their eating patterns matter to others, and so they pretend, by eating when they are alone, that they eat very little. They enjoy the secrecy involved.

(h) The all-nighter eats normal amounts during the day, then eats throughout the night, getting out of bed frequently to raid the refrigerator. It may be that this secret eating reflects a need for privacy; it may be the only thing in the all-nighter's life that is his or her own.

(i) The comfort eater eats normal amounts except when under stress, then eats until the anxiety is blotted out. Even small worries can trigger the eating. Comfort eaters have difficulty dealing with their feelings. They generally learned in childhood that it is better never to show feelings.

(j) The gobbler eats all food very fast, and as a result consumes more than if

Steps Toward Positive Action

lose weight, lower your intake. To keep it off, raise your awareness.