The American Roommate Experiment

she and I, both afraid of the future

IF OPPORTUNITY DOESN’T KNOCK, BUILD A DOOR

“It’s ironic because I’m drowning in those nightmares. And that was not how it happened. It’s as if my head has come up with new different ways to haunt me in my sleep.”

Then, the words “I love you, Rosie,” from the lips of the man I loved were whispered in my ear. “I love you like I’d never loved anything before. And I’ll love you for the rest of my life if you let me.” And before I could even process what I was doing, I was turning in his arms and I was looking into his brown eyes, giving him the easiest yes I’d ever have to give anyone.

Rosalyn Graham,

Will you be my best friend?

My roommate.

My Dancing Queen.

My experiment life partner.

My heart.

Will you be mine, just like I’m completely, hopelessly yours?

“Culinary school. I was just too blind to see it. Too stubborn and hopeless. I still believe I’m too old for it, and I know I might fail, but I’m determined to try. Because it’s what I want, the thing, beside you, that makes me dream of a future again.”

“Culinary school. I was just too blind to see it. Too stubborn and hopeless. I still believe I’m too old for it, and I know I might fail, but I’m determined to try. Because it’s what I want, the thing, beside you, that makes me dream of a future again.”

“But then,” Lucas continued, and his voice cracked with barely contained emotion. “Then, I read your book. The one you wrote while we lived together, were together. The one born from our dates.”

My lips parted, my heart raced in my chest. “Lina sent it to me, told me to read it. And I… God. Everything I didn’t believe of myself, everything I couldn’t possibly think you saw in me, was there. I saw myself through your eyes. You loved me. And knowing someone like you could love me when I wasn’t whole only made me want to do more. Be more. It made me want to become a better man for
myself. A worthy one, for me and you. To prove you right. It made me want to earn that love you were willing to give me, Rosie. And that’s what I’m doing. Or trying to do.”

“You’re here. Why are you here?”

“I’m here because I love you. Because I thought I had to walk away, Rosie. Because I didn’t feel worthy of you. Of us. And because I’m ready to grovel as much as I need to to get you back.”