Mindful Listening

Summarize or paraphrase key points to show understanding and strengthen the connection with the speaker.

Utilize affirmative body language—position toward the speaker, nod, and vocalize agreement.

Hopefully you can see that the issue was simply that they were unprepared.

listeners do not receive the same level of praise, attention, instruction, or credibility as speakers. They should!

If we continue to think that listening is easy, automatic, and not so important anyway, we will continue to fail to make any efforts to improve. We may encounter good advice that may genuinely help us communicate better, but ignore it, thinking, “That doesn’t apply to me.

There is appreciative listening, empathic listening, comprehensive listening, and critical listening.

Just like there are many, many different ways to speak, write, and express yourself, there are many ways to listen. Not all ways of listening are created equal, and what is appropriate in one context may not be so in another.

The partner protests and denies this, and promptly repeats everything they’ve just been told, in precise detail.

Here’s a story you have probably heard before, or else lived through yourself.

Entering a discussion with a pre-existing agenda

• Conversations had under duress, force, or emotional manipulation—for example, one party wants to avoid it, whereas the other wants to force it

• Automatically judging someone’s grammar usage, accent, or mode of expression