Read People Like a Book: How to Analyze, Understand, and Predict People’s Emotions, Thoughts, Intentions, and Behaviors

“actions speak louder than words”

Projection is a defense mechanism that can cause considerable damage and chaos if not understood for what it is. In this case, we place unwanted and unclaimed feelings onto someone or something else rather than seeing that they are a part of ourselves. We do not recognize our own “dark side” and project it onto others, blaming them for our shortcomings or seeing our flaws in their actions.

Even the least emotionally and socially intelligent people can learn something about other people if they engage with them long enough.

denial and rationalization.

dark exists because of light

we look for patterns.

That said, we can certainly become better at reading the observable signs. “Theory of mind” is the term we use to describe the ability to think about other people’s cognitive and emotional realities. It’s the (perfectly human) desire to make a model about someone else’s thoughts, feelings, and actions. And like any model, it’s a simplification of the depth and complexity of the real person in front of us. Like any model, it has limitations and doesn’t always perfectly explain reality.

These are the people who know how to talk so that others really hear them, or the people who can quickly detect when someone is lying or trying to manipulate them. Sometimes, such a person may perceive someone else’s emotions and understand their motivations to a degree that even exceeds that person’s insight into themselves.

If a person does the same unusual thing five times in a single short conversation, then that’s something to pay attention to. If someone simply claims, “I know that woman. She’s an introvert. I saw her reading a book once,” you wouldn’t exactly call them a master at unraveling the human psyche! So, it’s worth remembering another important principle: in our analysis, we look for patterns.

eye contact is discouraged because it’s thought to be disrespectful.