The Mane Event

“I was a prostitute. A damn good one too.”

“Stop lyin’, Rhonda Lee,” her mother called from the kitchen. “I doubt you were good at all.”

“You tree-climbing heifer!”

“You car-chasing slut!”

Dez shook her head. “I’m surprised you don’t want to tattoo ‘Property of Mace Llewellyn’ across my fuckin’ forehead

I didn’t even do anything.”

“You did ask her if she killed Petrov. I think your exact words were, ‘You whacked him, didn’t you? You sadistic bitch.’”

Didn’t she know? “Yes” to dinner today. “Yes” to marriage tomorrow. Dammit, he had a schedule to keep.

He never wanted to be her best friend. He wanted to be her boyfriend. He wanted her parents to catch them on their couch making out. He wanted to buy her one of those tacky ID bracelets with his name on it. He wanted to tattoo “Property of Mace Llewellyn” on her forehead