Rest in the Mourning

to the morning
and the sun dissolves the moon
you find yourself
losing more of who you were
you find yourself smiling
while sadness soaks your soul
fits of laughter
just to keep the tears from falling
you’ve gotten so much better
at disguising your anguish
sometimes we wear masks so long
to hide what we truly feel
that those layers become
an extra skin, a part of our identity
and that’s what you’ve become
your reflection is the lie
that keeps others from asking you
what’s wrong or wondering why

don’t believe him
when he says
it was supposed to be you
because when he hangs up
the phone
after professing his love
he’ll return to the life
with the woman
he left you for

i think the hardest part
is realizing
that the people we want
are sometimes
incapable of providing
what we deserve
and sometimes
what we really need
is to let go
in order to find something
worth holding on to

raise your standards

and say nothing

to those

who hate

below you

loving you was too draining

only to realize that you’ve been waiting
for something that won’t occur
and this realization usually arrives

can recall the pain that followed
i invested all of my energy
all of my time and love
into you
as i suffered because
you refused to do the same
you hurt me
and instead of seeking revenge
i packed up my emotions
and tossed away all of your empty promises
of change
no longer a prisoner to your false claims
of feeling bad or being sorry
for all the ways you destroyed my heart
i was able to lead
and live a life

i almost gave up on myself
when you gave up on me

the hardest thing
you’ll ever learn
is how to let go
of the things
that used to be
worthy
of your energy

you’re just tired
that’s it
you’ve been fighting
for their love
and affection
for so long
that you’ve forgotten
how to love yourself