The Modern Break-Up

“There’s always a guy—or a few guys, actually—out of all the guys you meet who stick around in your mind for a long time. They’re in ‘the web.’ You think about ‘em from time to time or you see a post of theirs on Insta and you reach out. There’s still a bit of hope they’ll catch up with you again. And it goes around in a circle,” she said.

Do you know what’s fucked? You speak to someone so much, and then they act like you never shared any real connection.

“Getting your heart broken is one of the most painful things in life … it’s your sense of direction changing. It’s your future being smashed into a million pieces. To lose all direction is a helpless feeling. Without having something to look forward to, you have no incentive to do purposeful things. But your main aim now—and it will take time—is to rebuild a future in your mind without him. Once that starts to become clearer, you will think of him less. I promise. It’s a step-by-step process.”

Sometimes in life, there is no way out, but there is always a way through.

Sometimes I find myself writing emotional texts to people (either out of anger or hurt) then contemplating whether I should actually send them. I’ll think of all these things I want to say, hold back from sending, backspace and edit the text five times, hold back even harder, and then get weak and push send. I try to convince myself to send it by saying, “I should always express myself no matter what” or “Maybe if I explain my point of view and how I’m feeling, they’ll care.” Needless to say, most times I don’t get the reaction I want from someone who didn’t give a shit about me in the first place. And yep, it makes me feel like even more of an idiot.

When I give someone a chance, it’s in the hope that maybe, just maybe, they will be the one I don’t have to play games with. Equal attraction, equal love, equal goals. Wouldn’t that be amazing?

Real love feels better. It’s more available. It’s long conversations. It’s feeling like you can call that person at any time of the day, but more importantly, not being scared that you’ll look desperate in the process.

Sometimes, where pure light is perceived, darkness lingers.

I think a lot of the misunderstanding in the modern dating scene comes from not communicating properly. We don’t speak; we don’t even try to understand each other. And I’m not ignorant. I know I will never understand some people, but in general, there are answers out there when it comes to why men act the way they do.

You need to stop being so nice and actually bruise their ego.