Baek Sehee

Today, as Ever, I’m in the Process of Getting Better

When you feel like someone seems superior to you, you should try applying those standards to someone with different circumstances.

So what if she thought less of me and was mocking me? That’s not the end of the world.

art is about moving hearts and minds

Psychiatrist: Perhaps your perception of reality is so polarised and extreme that you’re only able to see your sisters within the framework of ‘Everything about us is the same’ or ‘Everything about us is different.’

Me: You mean it’s a matter of my perspective and has nothing to do with reality itself?

Me: Am I really that extreme?

Psychiatrist: It’s not that you’re ‘that extreme’. You simply have a certain tendency. First of all, I think you need to spatially separate your work and your rest. If you were stressed at work, you ought to be relaxing when you’re home, but you’re sitting at home listening to recordings of yourself. This mixes up the two spaces, which makes you feel near-constant shame and anxiety.

Feelings of envy are very common, it only means you have ideals. But envy coupled with constant comparisons with oneself is something distinct. I think you’re only idealising her a little, it doesn’t seem that seriou

Psychiatrist: It’s a question of whether ‘everything you ever wanted’ was ever what you really wanted in the first place.

What matters isn’t what people say but what you like and find joy in. I hope you focus less on how you look to other people and more on fulfilling your true desires

We went to a bar after the club. I didn’t want to get drunk, and I managed to stay sober at first, but then I ended up getting drunk. It was near the end, and I can’t quite remember what happened, but I noticed the president and the moderator signalling to each other that someone should put me in a cab. I became so ashamed of this faint memory, and I got the feeling they hated me.

Psychiatrist: Maybe they were simply concerned for you?

Me: What?

Psychiatrist: Well, when one has a friend who’s very drunk, one calls a cab for the friend so they can get home safely.