Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie‎

it's really good

I obviously agree with the many things said here but I don't like the way the author says that we must question the status quo and gender in itself but when it came to her own gender perception she did nothing to question it. She proceeds to say that everything about her femininity that she inherited from male gaze is "incidental" and that it's her choice to do so, which is so contradicting to say. You want to challenge the status quo but you don't want to challenge why it is that you internalize some rules and things about your own femininity that actually came from men themselves? I really hated that portion because it all falls on "choice feminism" aka "It's my choice so it's fine" without dwelling more into patriarchal standards of femininity that women go through and silently internalize, because that's exactly what it means to question the status quo. Sometimes our choice isn't actually our choice and that needs to be discussed. You don't live in a vacuum; as we live under patriarchal system we constantly internalize those rules and standards and they need to be examined, not swept under a rug.

I also didn't like how it ends on a note that all women and men equally have to do better, because the responsibility of "doing better" should fall more on men because they're the ones who have gotten us to this point. Obviously, there are many women who internalize misogyny but that's again the fault of men around them! And women already do enough to try and fight sexism and misogyny but they can't ever win because of stubborn men. Men have SO MUCH MORE to learn and unlearn.

I wholeheartedly agree with the rest but those two things kind of spoiled this for me and I just have to point it out